With the constant influx of political news recently, it’s difficult not to become opinionated. In light of all the tension between people with different opinions, I recently decided to watch a TED Talk titled, “How to Talk to a Bigot” by Doug Stevenson. The talk started off on the topic of prejudices – which is where I expected it to go – so I was reflecting on my own prejudices, when the speaker said something quite unexpected. He said “I am a Bigot” and, like me, everyone in the audience went silent. I thought: surely this man is not a bigot, he’s here talking about how to talk to bigots. He explained himself, “I am a bigot because of my hatred for bigots”. I was perplexed; the definition of bigot is a person who is intolerant toward those holding different opinions. Nowhere in that definition did it mention what immediately comes to mind when I think of a bigot, no racism, no white supremacists. So, unsettled, I sat with that thought for a moment. I am a bigot because, I too, hold a deep-seated resentment towards bigots. The talk concluded by saying the only productive way to talk to anyone about something you have differing opinions on is to set aside your hatred. I did not want to have hatred in my heart, as this man so reasonably pointed out. 

I could not stop thinking about this TED talk. I went down a spiral of self reflection; I was undoubtedly guilty of judging these people whose ideas I am diametrically opposed to. When I encountered someone who believed or supported anyone that believed another human being is worth less than them, my blood boiled. How could I let go of this hatred? I mulled it over and thought back to this paradox I remember reading about. If intolerance is tolerated and allowed to exist, then there will no longer be any tolerance. So the paradox is that tolerance cannot exist without intolerance of those who are intolerant. 

So what is true? Am I a bigot for being intolerant of bigots, or am I protecting tolerance by being intolerant? I think the best answer is that being intolerant does not always equate to bigotry. However, in order to avoid becoming a bigot while being intolerant, it is best to approach bigots with empathy rather than hatred. Not to pretend like intolerance is acceptable, but to try to understand why they believe in it. Only in this way can any real progress be made towards a more tolerant world. After this introspection, I can say that I was a bigot, but moving forward I will try to expel my immediate emotion of hate and approach bigots in a productive way. Perhaps no change will be made in their minds, but my mind will be a better place for it.

 The next time you react to someone with contradicting opinions, ask yourself: am I a bigot?