With all the craziness that has been going on in the world, all revolving around the Covid-19 pandemic, it has been a personal struggle of mine to stay calm and collected while in quarantine. Not being able to go about my typical routine has left me not feeling like myself. I am simply a “quaranteen” looking for some peace through all the chaos.

As a result of the stay at home orders being implemented, and social distancing measures being taken, I have been stripped away of my typical emotional outlets. In the past, my entire wheel of emotions have always been relieved through playing sports and doing physical activities outside. Playing soccer and running track were always the ways I dealt with my built up stress and emotions in distinguish to hardships that resulted from tough days both at school and at home. The lack of having this familiar emotional outlet was a difficult pill to swallow but made me realize that I had to look for another way to alleviate all the new stress and emotions building up inside of me because of the unfortunate precautions that had resulted from the Covid-19 pandemic. Thus leading me to try out all the possible hobbies and activities I could do from the safety of my home until I found the right one for me that felt peaceful and comforting.

Binging shows and movies has always been an enjoyable activity for me, but I did not want to fall down the same lethargic path as many “quaranteens” had. Moreover, as much as food appealed to me and always will, constantly cooking delightful meals and delectable goods was not the right fit and would speed up the process of getting myself out of shape. Working out at home was nice but still wasn’t cutting it and would never be the same as playing sports outside with peers. Going through one activity after another seemed pointless and didn’t seem to be functioning the way I hoped, that was until my mom and sister suggested painting.

My first reaction right off the bat was “why in the world would I try painting” since I had always disliked it as a kid thinking it was a messy activity and hard to be good at. Never the less, my mom and sister tempted me to give it a try with cute little canvases, as big as my iphone, believing that I was not the same person that hated painting as much as I did in my early childhood. That led to my first little painting of a yellow Volkswagen bus with the beach as its background. After finishing it, I felt a sense of composure and was calm along with pleased upon what I possessed as my first piece of art, so, as you might have guessed it, painting would be crowned as my new form of emotional outlet.

I made it a goal to do at least a couple every week, when I had time away from homework and chores, and continued to get better emotionally and as an artist. Each little painting brought me joy and was rewarding to see what my effort could create on a canvas. All the depictions that were created were placed all over my room as decorations and as a way for me to make the vastness feel more comforting and fruitful as I gazed about the entire room. Most of my family took a liking into my art and as a result I painted canvases for them that included the biggest painting I had made, as a Mother’s Day gift for my mom, of my mother’s fantasy pink home along the shores of a beautiful beach.

It may have not been anything sports related and very physical like I was used to but I had found something that personally helped bring me peace in a truly chaotic time. Painting aided me when it came to having patience that things will get better and finding tranquillity when I felt like my head was about to spin off my body. All in all, I am overjoyed over the fact that I began painting during this quarantine, it has brought me with much needed reconciliation along with introducing me to a beneficial and constructive way to spend my new found free time at home. My only wish would be to go back in time and tell my younger self to have some faith in painting and not to be so hard on it because she just might end up loving it one day and using it to guide her through rough times that would start in her very near future.